Submerged

Suddenly the sadness

submerges me

leaving me gasping

for breath

Drowning in

an ocean of tears

Trying with all I have

to stay afloat

but I’m so tired

of trying

and getting nowhere

Going round and

round in circles

getting nothing

but dizzy

and disorientated

Finally,

I crack…

My head explodes

The contents spewing

everywhere.

Holding my breath

I go under

No longer in control

Going deeper

Into the darkness

Of the abyss.

She rose from the dust

You’d never have dared

If I hadn’t been on my knees

If I wasn’t already broken

You wouldn’t have the guts

To look me in the eye

As you played with your fly

You wouldn’t dare approach

a woman like me normally

but when my carcass

was weak, you swooped

in like a vulture, dragging

me to the depths of hell.

Where you reside

and then in shame

I hid too.

Using your perceived

position of power,

to prey, to pounce, to violate

my shattered mind

With your lurid intentions

Framed as banter, patter,

Words, just words

but words, that ripped

more flesh from my bones

traumatising my soul

While I was experiencing

grief for the loss

of the woman I was

for this stranger

I didn’t know yet

She was my best friend

The only one who knew

everything, all the shadows

All the light, all the joy,

All the pain, all the love,

All the stories written

along the alphabetic

rollercoaster of my life.

I was still enduring,

battling through,

Learning my strength,

Rebuilding myself

Writing a new chapter

In the book of my life

Getting to know who this

New me was going to be

To adjust my mind

My heart, my soul,

My body burned

with unseen flames

My head exploding

with unheard screams

My heart still cradling.

shattered dreams

You were given a butterfly

To hold, to be gentle with

And your role demanded

You take care of it,

And instead, you crushed

A butterfly’s wings

So fragile, so delicate,

so light and in it’s place

rose a dragon,

forged in fire

yet unconsumed

by its power

She rose from the dust,

Flying, stronger, wiser

than ever before

So if you think

for one minute more

I will carry your shame

You are wrong

I am crying my last tear

As I write this

Testament of truth

to the woman I am

and the scars I carry

A woman strong enough

to endure, to grow, to learn

who loves so deeply

that loss and pain

brings her to her knees

and with every fall, she rises

Over and over again

To love some more

and cry too

but never again

over you.

.#WritingforFreedom#emotionalhealthmatters#writeyourownstory#LetitGo#Thisisme#iambrave#MeToo#Shame#Notminetocarry

25Robert Knox, Wee Tracee and 23 others40 commentsLikeCommentShare

The Devil came to Town

The devil came to town today,

Riding in a black limousine

Appeared right in front of me

Like a scene from out a dream

He appeared at the Piazza

The one at Paisley Cross

I tooted to say hello

but I was at a loss

Was this really happening

or had I lost my mind?

I knew I’d just claimed,

my inheritance divine.

Was he there to deliver

or try to buy my soul?

Was he going to make me an offer

of some fool’s gold.

The lights turned red

And the devil did obey

As I sat there behind him

wondering what I’d say

He turned to the left,

up Causeyside Street

I wondered, was it really me,

he had come to meet.

Pondering all the places

where did I think he’d go?

Just at the wishing well

I would finally know

Right outside The Welly

He pulled up the car

Would he make me an offer

To become a star?

Just like in the movies,

or written in a book.

If you don’t know the stories,

You’ll find them if you look.

I’d looked for him before

When desolation struck

But even with the devil

I was outta luck!

Walking up to meet him

Smiling like the sun

Did other people laugh,

or was I the only one?

I laughed so much

I couldn’t help greeting

Nobody would believe me

If I told them of us meeting

So out in the light

a kind stranger I did ask

“Would you my friend,

perform this small task?”

He took a wee picture

of me with a beamer

Is this the real life,

or am I just a dreamer?

An Angel Awakens

You brought me death, and showed me life.
Instead of joy, you brought me strife.
You showed me love comes in many forms,
And can bring the worst of thunderstorms.
You left me so low,
I didn’t know where to go.
I love you so much yet it hurt so deep.
That instead of life, you chose sleep.
I know you laid a path for me,
Something at the time I couldn’t see.
It’s ten years now, and baby what a ride.
So many signs, you are still by my side.
Your brothers and sisters have filled me up,
With so much love from the eternal cup.
When the time is right, my little girl.
I will join you for a whirl.
Dance the dances we never shared,
Show you just how much I cared.
I love you with all my heart,
Even though at times we feel so far apart.
I am with you, and you with me.
What love binds together lasts eternally.



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